"Silent Chaos", a poem by Sharanya Jayachandran from BSc BTCFS I year

I cry, but the tears refuse to fall.
I scream, yet silence swallows me whole.

I ache to be unkind, to lash out,
but my own heart whispers no.

I long for eyes to find me,
yet I remain a stranger in my own skin.

I crave to be asked,
but not broken apart by questions.

I stand in the crowd,

smiles and voices surrounding me,
yet inside, I drift into empty space.

I reach for the ones I love,
but the distance between me and myself keeps growing.

I want to be honest,
but the lies I tell myself are easier to hold.

I am me,
but I am not myself.